Goodbye perfection

Ridding yourself of the need – or desire – for perfection is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself because it’s a package deal. When you say ‘see ya later’ to perfection, expectation and disappointment get walked off the gangplank too. I’ve been painting a bit recently. The hidden bonus, beyond the calm […]

Choice and opportunity

I recently caught up with a friend whose partner left her after she had a late-term miscarriage. We were talking about being single when you’re in your mid-30s and basically how much it sucks. The thing is: she didn’t choose her situation, not for a second. I know plenty of people who are dealing with situations […]

What it’s like to come off Pristiq

When I was weaning off Pristiq, I Googled the side effects with desperate zeal. I wanted to know what had happened to other people, how they dealt with it and, most importantly, how long it would take to start feeling better. There’s a lot of scary sh*t out there so I am writing this for anyone […]

The art of oversharing

There was a time when I kept my mouth shut. I didn’t tell people about the embarrassing, sad and stressful things in my life because privacy, right? I used to be horrified at the prospect of having to take anti-depressants, and even more alarmed at people knowing about it. I tried everything under the sun […]

The best days

One of the best days of my life was spent in Koyasan, a mountain town in Japan. I was travelling by myself, staying in a traditional ryokan and had a spare day to wander around. Koyasan is the birthplace of Shinto Buddhism so there are plenty of temples and shrines to explore, and because of its […]

School reunions

I have been to two high school reunions – 10 years and 20 years. The first one: I showed up overdressed, half drunk and with a chip on my shoulder. I drank too much, fell down a flight of stairs and almost certainly offended some people. The second one: I showed up as me. The difference? […]

Polymath

I love the concept of being a polymath aka ‘a person of wide knowledge or learning’. In life, we’re encouraged to specialise based on our talents and abilities. But what if you happen to be rabidly passionate about something you’re awful at? Or you have no experience of or exposure to a topic but you’re deeply curious […]

The friendship test

I have been thinking a lot about this since I wrote about losing friends earlier this week. In my life, there have been times that I would define as friendship tests. If you’re wondering who your friends really are, ask yourself this: Who visited you and looked after you when you were sick? Who was […]

Losing friends

Do you ever feel like you are losing friends? Either you have had a falling out, never hear from them or you make all the effort, which leads you to wonder: do these people even like me? One very efficient way to lose half your friends is to get divorced. The night that I found […]

Read/watch list for people who don’t care about celebrities

Do you struggle to find stuff to read/watch that resonates? I hate most reality television. I don’t like sport. I have no interest in celebrities, diets or fashion (except for when I’m on holiday – I love reading Vogue). Subsequently, I come up short when I am looking for new stuff to read or watch, even though […]