I believe that the real work of life is trying to figure out what kind of person you are, and what your ideal growing conditions are.

We’re not always born in the right climate.

Just like a plant, we all have basic requirements: soil, sun, water, temperature, nutrients.

Have you ever seen a frangipani trying to grow in a frosty climate? Or a fern trying to grow in a desert?

It just doesn’t work. Life will always be a struggle.

What you need to figure out is where you grow best. What kind of food you need to eat, what kind of weather suits you.

Beyond these physical needs, you need to surround yourself with your kind of people. Ask yourself: what are you into? And do your friends and family nurture these interests or stymy them?

At times, I have been friends with people out of circumstance rather than choice. Subsequently, I never quite fitted in.

But these days? I am connected with people who are a lot more like me; people who love food and cooking, gardening and the outdoors, travelling, reading, films, yoga, walking, meditation and wine.

I feel myself flourishing in their presence.

If you want to grow, figure out where you belong and go there.