Lately I have had a bit of exposure to douchebags; the kind of men who revile their mother and frighten animals.
I have learnt a thing or two about how to spot them. Read on, dear friends, and save yourself the embarassment of dating one of these creatures.
1. They have no friends
No best friend? No friends who aren’t blood relatives? No cohesive social group of any kind? Chances are this person is a pariah for good reason. They’re probably a mean, psychotic drunk, commitmentphobe or a real downer to be around for any length of time.
2. They play a lot of computer games or watch a lot of movies
World of Warcraft anyone? When a person’s social life consists of Blood Elves, there’s a chance they are trying to escape a less than optimal reality. Same goes with movies. If they would rather sit in front of the TV alone all weekend, let them.
3. They’re not on Facebook
Who are they avoiding? Who have they offended who wants to track them down and hurt them? Are they in Witness Protection? How many girls have they impregnated who are looking for their Baby Daddy? Suspicious.
4. They sext you constantly
Not only do they sext you; they sext you without any sort of conversational preamble. You ask about a Baba Ganoush recipe and bingo, they’ve got a boner they want to share with you.
5. They let you pay for everything
Bad sign. You’re a girl and the rules of misogyny state that a guy should at least make an effort to buy you a drink. Plus, it’s just normal politeness to flap some cash in the general direction of the person buying you things.
How do you spot douchebags? Have you ever dated one?