My life is a country song

My cat died, I lost my stuff in a fire and the guy I like doesn’t want a girlfriend.

If I had access to a beer right now, I would be crying into it.

It’s the Chinese year of the Black Water Snake and truthfully, if I had a shovel I would be chasing that goddamn snake around the backyard with ill intentions.

Hands up who’s had enough of bad stuff?

Say it with me, folks: THIS YEAR SUCKS.

But you know what? Some awesome stuff has happened too. I got this great new job where I get to write for a living, I’ve visited Japan, Lord Howe Island and I’m going to China and Darwin.

Also, most of us are still standing, including my Gran who escaped from the aforementioned fire unscathed.

So let’s raise our tearstained beers to surviving the rest of 2013, to love and friendship and the pursuit of dreams. And to the black water snake? In the inimitable alternate lyrics of The Angels: ‘F*ck you, get f*cked, f*ck off!’.

Wanna have a whinge about this year? Bring it on.

Country album

‘Dorothy’ is my stage name. My horse’s stage name is Lucky. We have these long talks all the time. His real name is James and he’s a Sagittarius.

 

Comments
12 Responses to “My life is a country song”
  1. Phil says:

    Not AC/DC, wasn’t it The Angels?

  2. literatechicken says:

    ^^ Also, when you write a post about how things suck, someone tells you it contains an error 😉

    Onwards and upwards, lady! I don’t know if this will let me post a gif but I’m going to try … this will be us soon!

    http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/lemon-greatestnews.gif

  3. @shegoes says:

    Phil you’re totally right! I just updated that. Ha. Clearly my musical knowledge is AMAZING.

  4. @shegoes says:

    Who is this someone? Is it the spam filter? Can things not suck any more? IS TONY ABBOTT ALREADY CONTROLLING THE INTERNET?

  5. Natureboy says:

    There is so much to be grateful for. Do you feel at all liberated by your loss of things? I mean that in the sense that the things you own end up owning you and now you are free from that (at least for a while??)

    I’ll miss that cat too. She was beautiful in so many ways – not just name.

    And though it sucks that the guy you like doesn’t want a relationship, at least you are meeting people. One day we will all find the one we want (and who wants us back). Until then it’s fun looking!

    I’m so grateful for the friends and people in my life. They make me feel loved and bring fun.

  6. fiona says:

    What a run of bad luck you are having, things can only get better from here. 2013 has been a tough year for me too, the light at the end of the tunnel for me is my bub due in Dec 🙂 hold onto the positive 🙂

  7. Rachel says:

    Chin up Em, things will get better.

  8. Mel says:

    I’m sorry to hear its been so rough Em – I really am. Love you heaps lady and RIP Bella.

  9. @shegoes says:

    OMG congratulations! I hope you are having a smooth pregnancy and that you name the baby something like Woo Woo Sunbeam.

  10. Lou says:

    I’m so sad about your cat!!!! She was magical!!!! Sending you lots of hugs xxxxxx

  11. Anne says:

    What is it with men who don’t want girlfriends?! I’ve been keen on 3 different guys throughout the year, but all 3 have said the same thing. The first one didn’t strike me as unusual at the time, the second one I started to question, but the third…OMG what the hell is going on?! Can’t be a coincidence. And I don’t believe I’m a scary person. The latest one said he likes me and thinks I’m lovely and beautiful (phew self-esteem given a life-line) but he still doesn’t want to be more than friends. Hmmm…are they hanging on waiting for a perfect model to walk in the door? Another one said to me he was seeing a friend with benefits and was quite happy with that arrangement. So perhaps that’s the issue! They can get it easily and safely whenever they want, be friends with us for the conversation and to share common interests, and they can manage living by themselves. So I guess why would they need or want to be in a relationship? Sux though. And goodness knows what to do about it. If you work it out, let me know!

  12. Lisa says:

    I hadn’t heard about your beautiful cat, hon – so sorry. And how devastating about your things. Even though everyone is lucky to be alive, that’s terrible news – you had such beautiful things! Hang in there, and let’s go out again soon – lots of love x

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