The wild women project

It’s back. It’s taken me a while to get organised (like, 18 months) but The Sensible Advice for Wild Women project is back. I don’t think I will do the book straight away. Instead, it will be a regular column here on SheGoes and I will collate the book from the best of what goes on here. Nothing like taking your time with things.

Bimbadgen Moscato_MH_750ml
This delicious looking wine could be yours!

To get started (again), I have some wonderful news. The kind folk at Bimbadgen Estate have given me three bottles of their new release Moscato to give away.

To win a bottle of this marvellously girly fizz, all you need to do is post your best piece of wild woman advice in the comments section. I will let the Bimbadgen crew pick the winners.

To get you started, here are a few I wrote on the fraught topic of Men:

  • Marry someone who thinks you’re beautiful (and tells you often). It doesn’t matter if you look like a German sausage. The simple fact is that if your husband doesn’t think you’re the prettiest damn German sausage he’s ever seen, you’re going to end up feeling like crap.
  • Don’t decide to get back with your ex when you’ve been drinking. Remember that 25 year old parking inspector that looked like Chewbacca you slept with after a night on the wines? Was that a wise move? Don’t go making important life decisions when you’re on the gin and tonics.
  • Don’t waste time with a partner who doesn’t try to make you orgasm. If he’s confused about female anatomy, he should just Google it like everyone else.
  •  Don’t go out with someone just because you think your Dad will like him.
  • If you find your partner irritating, boring or lazy before you get married, multiply that feeling by a million. That’s how you’ll feel after you have made a lifelong commitment to him.
  • Men can be very weird about women that love sex. Don’t worry about it. Always think, ‘What do I want to get out of this situation?’. If the answer is, ‘Sex’, go for it. If the answer is, ‘Respect, love and a life partner’, go for it anyway. The right guy will be stoked that he’s met someone like you. The wrong guy will act like a douchebag and dump you. Be warned that this may hurt but the pain is temporary. Spending your life with a douchebag is a worse kind of pain.
  • Men have feelings too. Just because you have PMS, are drunk, had a bad childhood – whatever – if you act like a complete bitch, apologise and mean it. Men fall in love, get hurt, get defensive and forgive just as easily as women. Always be kind.

Now go! What better motivation could there be than free wine?

6 comments on “The wild women project

  1. An advice for every gender. Find people who think like you and hold onto them. These are your people and male or female, black or white, these are the friends you need by your side. Make sure they challenge you. These are your dear friends.

  2. Learn how to cook . Keep a dozen basic recipes in your repertoire, which you can vary by ingredients. This is not a sexist or old-school thing — this is a practical thing. If your man is out at work all day, give him something he can come home to that is meaningful and nurturing to him — something he can look forward to. Why should he come home to you, if he can get a better meal at the pub? A hot meal says you care. Stressed for time? Invest one afternoon a month when you can cook good food in quantities, hopefully with both of you together in the kitchen. You can freeze these meals individually in plastic containers and ziplock bags. It’s a simple matter to heat them up (oven, stove-top, or microwave) when you want something healthy and delicious.

  3. Don’t expect men to be psychic. They do not always know what you mean or why you are upset or angry. Just tell them what has put you in a bad mood so they can hopefully understand it and do better next time. If of course you’ve told them the reason you’re annoyed is that they forgot your birthday/anniversary/family event etc despite specific instructions and the date circled on the calendar, then they probably aren’t paying enough attention to realise you’re pissed anyway.

  4. Invest in a good quality little black dress. Whatever the occasion, it will neither be too dressy nor too informal. My grandmother gave me this advice, pretty sure I will pass it down to my grandchildren (if/when!).

  5. Remember when life gives you lemons…

    … they go perfectly well in a margarita and best enjoyed with a good friend!

  6. If a man has a problem with you making the first move, the number of people you have slept with, or any other aspect of your behaviour, you shouldn’t want to be with him anyway! If you own all that you are and have done, you can move on until you find someone that doesn’t have a problem with those things – and probably appreciates them.

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